Leaving on a jet plane

I leave tonight for Nashville to see the twins. I'll be there just for the weekend. Its a must needed trip even though part of me wants to stay here. I need this time away to get my mind clear and on other things. It will be good to be with the guys. I pray it refreshes me.
When is love not love anymore but an obsession? I know I've asked this question before but maybe not here. Is it when the feelings aren't returned? What keeps me wanting what I cannot have? I've been trying to give this up for so long now only to take it back and try to make it into what I desire. I care for him. He trusts me. Tells me more than I think he should, for my own sake. But then he doesn't feel what I feel. Has too much in the way from a hurtful past. Or is the past just an excuse? Am I just not worth being loved?
I feel since I can't let this go, that it is being pryed from my clutched little fists. "Do what You must do, and do it quickly..."